Sunday, September 29, 2013

Happily after...

Another post inspired by The CBC, actually one line in a post by Bragadeesh.
Trainers use the term “paradigm shift” to explain a dramatic transformation, sometimes these transformations can be earth shattering for the individual concerned as the person will undergo a very big change, sometimes the biggest change in his / her life.

Falling in love is a paradigm shift. People get transformed when love strikes them and this is the love that makes lights glow, bells ring etc. Love stories keep writers, poets, movie makers busy churning out new variations of the same concept inspiring many to fall in love. In hindsight it must be one of the most fundamental feelings, a boy and a girl fall for each other.

There are many definitions for love and one of the famous lines from the Bible is probably the best description of love. For those who do not know it:


1 Corinthians 13:4-8

New Revised Standard Version (NRSV)
Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.

However as I said before, falling in love is a paradigm shift and it transforms people. It makes people do things they never thought they could have done before; they break rules they would not have done before in short they become new persons. Love is good. 

The last line in the description above states love never ends, but in real life it ends at times. This can bring about the doubt if what had ended was true love. As people can fall into love, they can fall out of love, sadly for some it becomes an end.There is life beyond love. This unfortunately is not accepted by those who end up killing themselves or killing their formerly “loved one”. As love causes paradigm shifts falling out of it can also cause another shift but in most cases it will not be back to how it all started before. Love, real or otherwise tends to leave its mark and it generally cannot be wished or washed away. In my opinion a person who gets up after love ends becomes a better and wiser person.

If the greatest teacher is experience, a paradigm shift is probably one of the best lessons that one can hope to learn. It helps people discover themselves, gain hidden talents and break new barriers, so if it does not end well at least it has shown the individual something about him / her that may have been lost for ever. Sadly some people seldom realize this and do not attempt to rise up from a fall, they decide that the fall is the end and decide to end it. If only they chose to pause, look at themselves and realize how much love has changed them. There is life after love, for those who choose to make the choice.

As they say it is better to have loved and lost than never have loved at all.

Video courtesy Youtube

Saturday, September 28, 2013

1 or 2? That is the question...

This post is inspired by the CBC. To clarify this is an expansion of a comment I had posted to a query on why people look for arranged marriages. While the stream of comments moved the focus away from the initial question there were some strong opinions for both sides and even some who chose the third option of simply single. As mentioned earlier this post is to expand my point and so read on…

(Disclaimer: What follows below are my hypotheses from observations and discussions. You are free to agree or disagree, to prove or to disprove as you please.)

The rule of nature is that like poles repel and unlike poles attract for magnets. In life also it may be true. Marriage works well when it becomes a supplementary union rather than a complementary union. If I am not very clear let me explain, two vanilla ice cream lovers go to an ice cream shop, you would expect one or two vanilla ice creams to be consumed by them.  This is a complementary union according to me.  Now if one vanilla ice cream and one chocolate ice cream lover go to the shop, each of them has the option of another flavour before them should they choose to share. This is a supplementary union, again according to me. Likewise two persons with the same outlook of life will have one lesser solution to a potential problem. That is what I mean by complement and supplement. As thalaivar said in a movie No 2 is better than No 1 though two may become 1.

These days in arranged marriages I have noticed that parents tend to match similar profiles in the hope that they will be more compatible with each other. While in theory it may seem fine, in reality it seems to put a lot of stress on working couples. With long hours being the norm today when both the spouses are in the same industry and in the age of equal employment both need to put in the same kind of work and then the wife usually does over time at home. In these matches, it appears the financial status and ego play a bigger role than maybe some lateral thinking.

If the saying “vaathiyaar paiyan makku” is believed then one teacher marrying another will put their progeny to undue and unwanted stress. Likewise two of a kind may be too much of a good thing. We should celebrate differences and enjoy the diversity. For this reason I am personally delighted in the increasing number of mixed marriages happening though a miniscule amount of them are arranged. Though many of these marriages again happen due to common areas usually workplace it is a start. At least similarities of caste, community, language have a chance to get ignored.

So what about me? If you wonder we complement and we supplement each other. It was the complementary things that brought us together and the supplementary things that keep us together.

Video courtesy Youtube

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Tring tring...

Mobile companies earn good money with the caller tunes. These caller tunes ensure that the caller does not have to listen to the boring ring and can actually make the wait pleasant for those at the calling end. There are so many tunes available of varied genres and churning out these tunes is an industry by itself that runs under the VAS moniker.

Companies paying the mobile bill and who are smart marketers end up imposing the corporate tone which is usually the company jingle or a promotional tune. I have wondered if these companies have some instruction that the incoming call be picked up after a few rings so that the caller gets the message. Fortunately my organization has the tune only in the Vodafone network and till date it is an optional tune. However there is an unwritten rule that the caller tunes should be preferably instrumental only.

Like the ringtones on the phone the caller tone also can give an insight to the person on the other end. Therefore it is obvious that the tone be selected with some thought. I would be very wary if I were to call a professional contact and be greeted by...

This post was caused by me calling a classmate after many years and I was told that he is in a senior role in the ITES industry. I was greeted by...

. For a brief moment I was stunned, then I told myself that it is the industry and it is a personal connection but still it was a little jarring.

I am used to being greeting by bhajans and... 
these people may need to be handled with care. While I respect their religious views at times it appears that this is imposing their views on others. I enjoy listening to old songs some of which come very rarely on TV or radio and you know that the person on the other side is either very old or very old fashioned. Likewise a hip hop number tells you that they will be from the post 90’s. I will leave it to you to figure out what to think of someone who has The Final Countdown as his ring tone.
While the caller tone can at best be a private embarrassment if inappropriate the ring tones can be very annoying to others and extremely embarrassing to the owner of the phone. During a serious meeting with the team there was one moment when at full came...

P.S. Nalla pottom avana..

Image courtesy Google Images
Videos courtesy Youtube

Monday, September 23, 2013

Go play...

Last night I played a game of snakes and ladders. You know the one where you keep some coins on a board and play with the roll of a dice. I lost the game finishing last but it was fun and for a moment I enjoyed going back in time, when board games included among others scrabble, Scotland Yard, coppit, monopoly (sometimes business) and battleship.  These games were part of my growing up and I realize wistfully how they have faded away. My grandmother had taught me the Indian roll of die and the game called “pallankuzhi”, when we were kids vacation times were spent playing one of these games; sometimes the adults will allow us to play cards with them usually Rummy or the Ace of Spades. 

These days games are all online and alone. Even multiplayer games are played over long distances. I played Scrabble for some time on Facebook but it did not feel good after a while and I simply gave it up. Even scrabble is a game of strategy, watching and observing the other players while you make your move. Ace of Spades is no different; you watch and try to find who is hiding the Ace for the cut. Where is the fun? I must confess I did succumb to the Facebook games including Farmville (is it a game?) and every other day I get invites to something called Candy Crush which I am not even bothering to open.

If you do get a chance to play one of these games, do not hesitate, get some people together and play. For some time become children again and bond with people, the people whom you may not get a chance to bond with due to the mobile phone, laptop, television and many more. Believe me it is worth the time and the effort.
Go play!

Images courtesy Google Images
Collage by
Youtube video of Inner Circle Games People play

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Moodar Koodam - a review

I am not a movie critic and for a movie review I suggest you visit this by one of my favourite reviewers. If you want to know if this movie is worth a watch and you share my sensibilities read on.

If you are wondering what is “my sensibilities”? Simple, I watch movies for fun, I am willing to suspend disbelief and rationale for the few hours in the movie hall and let myself be transported away from brain work and ensure that I get the best exercise in life in large measures. If these boxes are ticked then I recommend a movie. The classics are for other days. So while I love Nayagan, Micheal Madana Kama Rajan will be ranked higher because I can watch it any number of times and still enjoy it.

After a long introduction if you are still with me and know what to expect from this let me proceed. Coming among a stream of similar dark comedy movies this is another effort from many new comers and is based on the events of one night. Four men meet up in a police station due to various reasons and decide to commit a robbery, what happens after that is the movie. There are some nice touches especially with the back stories that use various styles for flash back tales. You can read more about the movie here.
The positives:
-  Some genuinely funny lines including two lines by henchmen which caused a thunderous applause. You must watch them
-     Generally underplayed acting by all ensuring that there is no stand out performance by any one and giving even the smallest role enough to evoke a reaction from the audience
-    Almost clean entertainment, no separate comedy tracks to  mar the narrative, no item songs, almost none of the usual masala stuff that can be expected of movies these days
-        Simple story so not much brain work
-         No unexpected song breaks

The negatives:
-       To many preachy lines, usually by the wise one (this movie is called Fools Gathering) who is also the director, it gets on to you after a point
-        A very simple story ensures that you can predict the ending almost
-        Editing could be better, some nips and cuts could have made the movie better
-       The back ground score is replete with several famous western classical pieces and did not always set with the movie (I hope they were credited to the composers and not the music director)
-          The ending seems an unfinished product as the usual attempt to tie up all loose ends with a convenient climax

The positives will outweigh the negatives and it is a movie that can be watched.  Go with an open mind you may come out happy.

Daddy enakku oru doubtu...

You may have seen the popular segment on the comedy channel and there are so many doubts like that in many of our minds too. Here is one that has been there for some time. Any daddy can answer this one…

I know of someone pointing out to the scar on her foot to her friend on the other end of a telephone conversation. I have seen another person pointing out ostensibly to the other person somewhere else again on the phone this time screaming words of abuse; the only problem was it was very confusing to those on the road who happened to find themselves at the end of the pointing finger. I have seen one person gesticulating wildly again while on the phone, the fact that this person was standing on the corner of a busy road in Chennai and was using the hands free earpiece ensured that only if you noticed carefully you could spot the wires.  From a distance it can be worth a few laughs.  I am amazed that people forget in a conversation over the phone the most that can be seen on the other side is supposedly a smile.

Then you have the singers, usually those who sing Indian classical; nowadays you can see a lot of them on TV with the many “reality” talent shows. In these shows you will see apart from the facial contortions the hand movements which can be mildly amusing. I am not sure if these actions are taught or if they are from within. The bigger doubt in my mind is whether they are expected of a singer. Some of these singers look like having a seizure some look like they are asking for alms or a favour and some like they are in a fist fight.

In martial arts you are asked to shout so that you get the extra power in the punch, in tennis you know of the grunters who assault many eardrums as they thump the ball. So do these actions provide the extra lift to the note of the song or expression in a conversation because volume will not be a challenge with the modern mikes and mouthpieces?

If you are interested in body language these can be for very interesting reading. One of the cardinal rules in public speaking is to practice before a mirror and observe oneself. A person on the phone may never see himself but a singer surely will, if not a mirror at least a TV show. 

Daddy enakku oru doubtu…