Tuesday, March 29, 2016

I struggled but I overcame - a CBC contest

I struggled but I overcame… with help

This post is my contribution for a contest by www.chennaibloggers.in. You can read more about this group at their website where you will find more such works by amateur, semi-professional and even professional bloggers and published authors from our Chennai. Read on…

I like to be with others, my friends, my family, peer groups etc but there are times when I like to be with myself and these times are crucial because they help me to reconnect with myself. Years ago when I was struggling with some challenges, the challenges now appear so trifling that I no longer remember them except for the pain they caused.

During one of these low moments when things were so low that I questioned the meaning of life the people around me failed to see the challenges I was fighting with. My support systems saw the outer me and failed to realize behind the smiling face was confusion, despair and other emotions that tortured me. I had an image to maintain and so the façade was solid and the reactions were normal but it was tough. Men hide behind illusions of power and control because the society can be unforgiving and weakness is usually not acceptable for the supposedly stronger sex.

Depression and its allied consequences can be tough and it is difficult for others to empathize with someone suffering from depression because to an observer it may seem exaggerated or even like a farce, but for the afflicted it feels like there is no light at the end of the tunnel. Help is crucial be it the professional type or just a concerned type.

It was not so bad that I needed professional help but I did not have the realization that help would have helped me recover. Help came from where it was least expected, a friend saw through the mask and reached out to me. Now she was a friend who was not very close to me and we had a history or disagreements, how she saw through me I never knew but in the crowd of so many others she reached out with a kind word, then a phone call and slowly there was a light at the end after all.

What happened after that is a blur but when I look back at the day when I found someone who saw through me, saw that I needed help and stretched out her hand, I feel a deep sense of gratitude. And that hand which reached out to me, I have not let go since.

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